I’m not currently:)
I'm Lauren, and I don't promote anything, but I deserve somewhere to rant about my feelings too
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I’m not currently:)
My mum. She’s the only person that immediately jumps to mind when the word ‘idol’ crossed my path. She’s such an inspiration and I can’t even begin to describe the love I have for her. She has to juggle so much and yet she always manages to put on a smile while in front of people. I love her beyond words, and even when we come to blows I could never ever say I hated her or even that I didn’t like her because she’s the most amazing person I know. I just can’t express the amount of love I have for her. She’s incredible and if there was anything I could do to make her happy I would. I would do anything for her. She’s my idol because she survives x
I don’t know, I try and treat them good but no one seems to stay so over the years I’ve just started to distance myself. I used to spend hours talking to my friends and now I just feel like they can’t really be bothered with me anymore. I’m a really fucking stupid and annoying person though so that’s probably it, I’m the “she’s good enough while you’re gone” friend x
I don’t think anyone apart from mixtureofsadnessandyoutubecrazy would class myself as their friend at the moment. Thank you Katie x
You promised you wouldn’t leave again but you did, and you will next time, and the time after that, and the time after that. Each time I’ll be the one forgiving you because it’s better to be lonely while surrounded by people than lonely with only your mind. Or is it? Each time I’ll forgive you and each time I’ll find another piece of me has become cold. Each time I’ll find myself getting angrier for forgiving you, but more excited that you came back. The excitement only lasts for a short while. I’ll never be good enough for anyone to view as a friend, I’ll always be the “she’s good enough while she’s gone” or the “she’s good enough for now” friend. Never will I be the first choice, and never will I be anything but a fill in. A promise is still a promise though, and you’ve broken it more times than I have fingers on my hands and toes on my feet.
Even my friends who claim to like me hate me, so what am I supposed to think of myself then?